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UPDATE: No stopping us

The Buy Bush a PlayStation 2 Campaign is an overwhelming success. In a matter of hours, we’ve managed to meet our goal thanks to a link from fark.com and the generosity of concerned citizens from around the world. However, I’ve received a lot of messages from people unhappy that the campaign was over so quickly, and that they missed their chance to be a part of it. I’ve also received numerous e-mails telling me that the proper game to send Bush is Conflict: Desert Storm, a tactical shooter in which the goal is to kill Saddam Hussein. Of course, this game is a perfect fit for the campaign. I also got several messages asking that we buy an extra controller so Cheney can play, and a few people even insisted that we buy the president a memory card.

So we’re gonna keep going.

At the $320 mark, Bush gets a copy of Conflict: Desert Storm (MSRP $49.99). If donations hit $345, Cheney gets a Dual Shock 2 controller (MSRP $24.99), and if we can collect $370, we’ll throw in a memory card so that the commander-in-chief won’t have to leave his PS2 on for long periods of time.

Again, keep watching this space, as I’ll be posting follow-up info over the next week or so. Stuff like photos, receipt scans, tracking numbers and a donor list.

Thanks again to the donors and supporters who have made this campaign such a smashing success.

Mikel Reparaz Buy Bush a PlayStation 2 Campaign

We now return you to your regularly scheduled Web site.

My fellow Americans and concerned members of the international community:

In the last few months, it has become increasingly apparent that the Bush administration is locked on course for a full-scale military invasion of Iraq. Nothing, it appears, will deter our President and his advisors from such an action. Saddam’s acceptance of U.N. weapons inspectors has been played down by the administration, and the general disapproval of other countries, as well as their refusal to participate, has led only to arrogant posturing from our leader. The President’s speeches have reflected this determination in the past months, as references to America’s flagging economy have been phased out gradually in favor of fiery rhetoric about Saddam Hussein and his alleged weapons of mass destruction.

My friends, the possible consequences of war with Iraq at this juncture have been discussed ad infinitum in the mass media. The U.S. singlehandedly deposing Saddam may very well destabilize the entire region and lead to increased terrorist attacks on the U.S. and its interests abroad. It will lead to ill will with our allies and endanger the progress of the war on terrorism. It will also be disastrous, if not for the U.S. and its military men and women, then for the civilians of Iraq, who already live under crushing poverty and constant fear of invasion. Saddam has proclaimed that he will take a war with the U.S. to the streets of Baghdad. How many innocents would be killed in such a fight?

Whether or not you agree with these assertions, you must at least admit they are valid concerns. And yet, the President and his cabinet have dismissed them, if not simply ignored them altogether.

At first, I was not sure about the reasons for Bush’s one-track mind on this issue. Perhaps the leaders of our great nation are under the impression that war will boost our nation’s economy, or at least distract us from it. Perhaps Bush is trying to avenge his father’s mistakes in the war-torn region. Perhaps their claims about Saddam Hussein’s status as an international threat are genuine, although this is doubtful.

These two simple items may help save thousands of lives. As I sat pondering the President’s motives one day, it suddenly dawned on me that it is entirely likely our Commander in Chief has never played a single video game in his life. “Of course!” I exclaimed, startling my girlfriend, who was driving at the time. “Without the catharsis that video games provide, Bush has no way of fulfilling his militaristic fantasies other than actually fighting wars.”

Our course of action is clear, my friends: We must help this man, and in so doing, help those whose lives will be affected by a full-scale invasion.

We of course cannot trust that Bush will eventually discover video games himself. They are not of his generation, and he is an extremely busy man besides. It is up to us, America, and so I propose the following: We must pool our funds and buy Bush a PlayStation 2.

To this end, the Buy Bush a PlayStation 2 campaign asks for your donations. Any amount is appreciated. With your help, we plan to raise the sum of $270, which will be applied to the purchase of:

One (1) Sony PlayStation 2 game console, MSRP $199.99, and One (1) copy of SOCOM: U.S. Navy SEALs, MSRP $59.99, a military-themed title suited to the President’s apparent tastes.

The remaining $10.02 will be used to cover shipping to the White House at 1600 Pennsylvania Ave., Washington D.C. Any amount contributed over the $270 mark will be refunded to the donor.

The following letter will be included with the gifts:

Dear Mr. President:

I represent a small consortium of voters who are deeply concerned over your proposed {or, if appropriate, ongoing} military action in Iraq. Given the amount of public speech and political rhetoric you have devoted to this issue in past months, it seems to us as though you are more interested in playing commando than in fighting an actual war with actual human casualties.

Enclosed with this letter, we have sent you some small gifts: one PlayStation 2 game console, one copy each of SOCOM: U.S. Navy SEALs and Conflict: Desert Storm, a memory card and an extra controller for Mr. Cheney’s use. We ask that you accept these gifts and use them, rather than the lives of Iraqi civilians and our U.S. servicemen, to fulfill any militaristic fantasies.


Mikel Reparaz Chairman Buy Bush a PlayStation 2 Campaign

The names of the donors will also be attached, unless they request otherwise. Obviously, it would be ideal to get signatures on the letter, but the logistics of sending the thing from donor to donor would be a nightmare of pyramid-scheme proportions. Not to mention that any war would likely be over by the time the letter got back to me.

If you are interested in supporting the Buy Bush a PlayStation 2 Campaign, please click the PayPal button below to donate.

If you would like to help spread the word about the campaign, we have a button you can post on your Web site. Please copy and paste the following HTML into your page of choice: http://www.evilninja.net/buybush.htm”> SRC=”“>http://www.evilninja.net/graphics/bushbutton.gif”>

Thank you, and God bless.


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